An introduction, links and thoughts on friendship.
Welcome to my home on Substack!
A fresh start
Well hello there! So here I am finally starting the newsletter that was on my 2018 to do list. What the hell happened?!
In short, I procrastinated. I’d built it up in my mind, I thought that it had to be the perfect piece of writing and basically put it on the back burner. Then I ended up feeling worse for not setting out to do the thing I said I was going to do.
Although I love Instagram, I wanted to have a space where I can revisit some of the topics from my Stories and share some interesting links.
If you’re new to my channels, I’m Kristabel, an influencer or content creator of almost 15 years. I started my blog when I was in university and now it’s become my job (it certainly keeps me on my toes). My content is a mixture of fashion, lifestyle, travel and random musings.
This month I’d like to talk about friendship. I’ve finished Friendaholic by Elizabeth Day and it’s definitely got me thinking about the changing dynamics from childhood to age 35. School definitely has a lot to answer for and it makes me wonder whether everyone gets bullied. Something for me to discuss in therapy perhaps…
I don’t always agree with Elizabeth Day’s writing and she is pretty privileged, but I feel that this book did what it needed to do. It would have been impossible for her to cover interracial friendships in so much depth, but her brief interviews with Paula Akpan and Sharmaine Lovegrove highlighted the solidarity that can happen with Black women (though this isn’t always guaranteed).
Now I’m 35 going on 36, I’ve realised that this is actually a good time in my life to make new friendships. I’m more self-aware, I’ve been to therapy and I know what I want out of the dynamic. It’s more about attitude rather than age, though I’m finding that younger millennials can be like Gen Z with strong values around inclusivity. In a similar way to relationships, I’ve realised that the chaos and lessons of my 20-something friendships will make me a better friend in years to come.
Let me know if you’ve read this book and what you thought over on Instagram! I’m bringing back my book club and the plan is for us to read ‘Real Friends Talk About Race’ in October for Black History Month. If this Time article is anything to go by, it should be an interesting read.
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What I’ve been reading…
Reality tv fame used to guarantee a career as an instagram influencer. That’s a thing of the past.
The ‘lazy girl job’ trend romanticises the drudgery of work.
‘Diversity dishonesty’ is the toxic workplace trend we’re not talking about enough.
Black teen girls are the curators of culture.
How A Magazine Claiming To Empower Female Founders Was ‘Birthed’ By A Controversial Church.
“Orange Is the New Black” Signalled the Rot Inside the Streaming Economy.
A Top Shein Exec on That Influencer Trip Fiasco.
Having an all-white friendship group isn’t a problem in itself but it is extremely telling.
My Content
I thought that this would be a good place to share recent posts but also some of my blog archive. It’s been four years since I was in Mexico for a textile tour and I’ve written about all of my colourful discoveries and some of the best markets. Although my money diary is a little old, hopefully it gives you an idea of how much things cost.
The July shopping list - flexible fashion and feel good clothing
A colourful guide to Negril Jamaica
Celebrating my sister’s graduation
All about my recycling journey
Some thoughts on the Barbie movie
IG live about mental health and therapy
You Need To Follow…
@the_oluwaseun you are bad for my bank account! She’s an ecommerce stylist as well as an influencer and will always tell you about the best sample sales on her Tiktok. Her looks have got me excited about transitional dressing again after a bit of a slump last year.
The Shopping List
Here are some of the pieces I have my eye on. I’ve also joined Vinted so make sure you check my listings over there.
Boden white lace trim mini dress
Farm Rio crochet trimmed denim jacket (on sale)
Free People embroidered midi dress
Joanie green puff sleeve green midi dress
Ganni black future printed cotton tee (on sale)
Until next month! You can find me over on Instagram, Tiktok, YouTube and my blog.